even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
zippers are such a cool invention
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!