Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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