"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
