I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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