JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?