I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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