Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.