I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Thank you for not boning my boss.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just had sex on a roof
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
