Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did angry sex become our thing?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize