im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize