It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.