then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
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Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
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Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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