Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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