I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
