so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
so let's talk penis.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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