she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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