The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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