and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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