Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.