I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
