For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
The 19 Creepiest Missing Person Cases
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
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