It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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