i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
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I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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