Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
