She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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