i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
