whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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