He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
