A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize