If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
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i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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