So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize