Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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