Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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