Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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