Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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