She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie