So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka