Sorry, I don't speak sober.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
He shit in the fireplace
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize