Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize