need another drink. this is the easiest way
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize