we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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