Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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