I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
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We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
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today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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