I heard we made out
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
