i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
