girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
