can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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