Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize