The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
