I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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