Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize